Mediation can work for all types of couples – those who are separating amicable as well as those with significant conflict to work through. Right now, the Minnesota court system actually encourages all couples to try mediation before litigation because it is highly effective, less expensive and can help families resolve issues more quickly. Here are some things that can help ensure that mediation is successful:
Understand the role of the mediator: The role of a mediator might not be exactly what you expect. Your mediator’s job is to facilitate positive and productive discussion based on your needs and your priorities. Your mediator will not make a ruling in your case – you and your ex will be empowered to work together to make decisions related to how to divide your joint property, creating a parenting plan and whether or not spousal maintenance should be considered. Your mediator is not a decider, but a facilitator. Understanding this role can be helpful as you begin the process.
Be willing for open and honest communication: One key factor in the success of mediation is the willingness of both parties to communicate openly and honestly to achieve resolution. This can be difficult, especially if your marriage has been characterized by lack of trust. Your mediator can guide you through this and talk about communicating differently to ensure a successful process.
Preparation: A significant amount of the divorce process is related to your finances. Before the mediation process begins, gathering pertinent documents like tax forms, income information, retirement and bank account balances, stock information, etc. can be extremely helpful.
Being willing to compromise: Litigation is based on the notion of winning and losing. However, mediation is based on compromise. If you are not willing to compromise, then the process may not be successful for you. Going into the process with an idea of your priorities and the priorities of your ex can help with a successful mediation.
Looking past your anger: There are many reasons why marriages do not last and for many, anger and conflict are involved. When you engage in the mediation process, it is important to try to move past that anger that you feel and focus on your future, rather than the pain that has gotten you here. Your mediator should be able to give you tips for healthy communication strategies.
Experienced Minnesota Divorce Mediator
If you are looking for an experienced divorce mediation firm that can help you and your family move forward with your life, call Johnson Mediation at 952-401-7599.